Many people post “New Year, New Me”, as if a date… a tomorrow, actually changes anything. From 11:59pm to 12:00 am the only change is a minute; 60 seconds, and yet so many people in the world post about how their life will change once that moment comes.

I remember the first time I watched the ball drop on television. My grandfather was watching my siblings and I as my parents went out for the night. I was adamant that I was going to watch the ceremonial New York City ball drop and I fought my eyes closing with everything I had. I can still picture his living room, the smell of musk and wood from his shop in the basement below as I lay on the couch next to him in his recliner, my sister already asleep on the adjacent couch.

I continued to tell him how I was going to make it to midnight, nothing was going to stop me from experiencing that glorified moment of the clock striking 12, the past year disappearing, a new year beginning. I remember waking up my sister when it was time, sitting inches from the tv with her as we watched the shinning sparkling ball drop lower and lower, counting back the numbers to when the time was going to change – the anticipation and excitement was overwhelming. And just like that, the ball stopped peacefully, confetti released throughout New York City, couples grabbed their loved ones, everyone was cheering and smiling, and I looked at him and said “that’s it?” I remember his laugh, his deep chuckle, and he turned to me and said “that’s it.” I went to bed astonished that this is what people celebrated; I felt no different, there was not any magical feeling or incredible change as I thought would happen; I was the same person I was only a minute prior.

And so for the next 20 years of my life it would bother me when people posted about resolutions on New Years Day as if that one minute should be the reason that you have decided to grab your life by the balls and take charge of it. With that being said, this year I recant. If this year has taught me anything it has taught me that life is ever-changing. You never know what the next 60 seconds can bring. Sometimes people just need an opportunity to give them the courage to fight for the life that they want, and if that change of 60 seconds enables you to take that step toward the better you – then run at the New Year, in full force (with under armor if necessary).

This year is ending as it started for me. It’s ironic as I see foreshadowing in everyday situations and this one blindsided me. 11 months ago I stood up for something that I believed in, a change that was needed, in hopes that people woke up to realize that life truly is too short. Two weeks ago I walked into the same battlefield, and deja vu hit hard. The same tears were shed, the same emptiness over came me, and I lost the one thing that I worked to create for a third of my life. Now I sit here like the rest of the world, waiting for the clock to strike 11:59:59 so I can take my last breath in 2018 and find the courage to conquer 2019.

So how do I do this? How to I have the strength to move on and prove to myself (because that is the only person in this world that ever truly matters) that I have more worth than what my past self has allowed me to believe, and that I have the power to make the change to succeed in my future endeavors?

Stop expecting.

We cling to our expectations, because the expected is what keeps us steady. But in all reality, the expected is just the beginning, it’s the unexpected that changes our lives.

Realize that change is okay, it is actually normal.

Change is literally the only constant in all of science. It’s the way people try not to change that is unnatural. The way we cling to what things were instead of letting things be what they are. The way we cling to old memories instead of forming new ones. The way we insist on believing despite every scientific indication that anything in this lifetime is permanent. Change is constant. How we experience change, that’s up to us. It can feel like death or it can feel like a second chance at life. If we open our fingers, loosen our grips, go with it, it can feel like pure adrenaline. Like at any moment we can have another chance at life. Like at any moment, we can be born all over again.

Keep your dreams alive.

Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, your vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.

I hope that you find the power in the 60 seconds to create the life that you desire. I hope that you find the courage to overcome any fears of change. I hope that your 2019 is everything you dreamt it will be, and I hope you find the strength to create just that.

Happy New Year